{"product_id":"cartilage-jackpot-t-shirt","title":"Cartilage Jackpot Shirt — Funny Getting Old Gag Gift Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eGetting old is just a waiting game for your structural integrity to collapse, so you might as well make it interesting. Skip the mega-millions and put your crumpled dollar bills toward a payout you actually need: a fresh, glistening set of load-bearing cartilage. This funny getting older t-shirt is the perfect gag gift for anyone whose knees currently sound like a bag of crushed gravel.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe ultimate degenerate fantasy isn't a yacht, it's getting out of a low chair without audibly groaning. Just scratch away the silver film with a dirty penny and pray for three matching menisci. You can't take it with you, but you'd at least like to walk to the bathroom.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMust be 18 years or older to claim bone density.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGrand prize paid out in unverified, warm bio-matter behind a 7-Eleven.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOdds of winning are exactly the same as your insurance covering a joint replacement (0%).\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBy playing, you forfeit the right to complain about your lower back.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003eA hilarious novelty gift for 40th, 50th, or 60th birthdays, featuring a retail fit that's perfect for everyday existential dread.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":48343929421876,"sku":"79888746722126983500","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":48343929454644,"sku":"22508443775790447958","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Red","offer_id":48343929487412,"sku":"48870543697998918337","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ True Royal","offer_id":48343929520180,"sku":"14134778726451831258","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":48343929552948,"sku":"14067500453562382431","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":48343929585716,"sku":"13986731670258341474","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Navy","offer_id":48343929618484,"sku":"29743689541023651405","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Red","offer_id":48343929651252,"sku":"19744034887288832303","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ True Royal","offer_id":48343929684020,"sku":"21992878109677883632","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":48343929716788,"sku":"79911933645182898987","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":48343929749556,"sku":"17674170317927279869","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Navy","offer_id":48343929782324,"sku":"30806136709435571962","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Red","offer_id":48343929815092,"sku":"27672960382783021382","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ True Royal","offer_id":48343929847860,"sku":"24449817982769041080","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":48343929880628,"sku":"20033616283715900464","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":48343929913396,"sku":"12846808412098743844","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Navy","offer_id":48343929946164,"sku":"12522829727182428847","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Red","offer_id":48343929978932,"sku":"83976736600540423729","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ True Royal","offer_id":48343930011700,"sku":"67977939703089443445","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":48343930044468,"sku":"25094269841508328776","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":48343930077236,"sku":"25725106743992366785","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Navy","offer_id":48343930110004,"sku":"13566603941027964010","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Red","offer_id":48343930142772,"sku":"16197541606190641017","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ True Royal","offer_id":48343930175540,"sku":"22177218535122913602","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":48343930208308,"sku":"10743276493345567612","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/wc-shot-cartilage-jackpot-t-shirt-0_77ed66f4-4a82-4d21-8c04-8a560e11d5b3.png?v=1789533148","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/cartilage-jackpot-t-shirt","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}