{"product_id":"dead-battery-t-shirt","title":"Dead Battery — T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eLook, funerals are expensive and towing him to the morgue feels like a rip-off. He was running fine yesterday. Just pull the Subaru around, hook up the leads, and let's see if we can get a turnover before we throw the whole guy away.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe ultimate suburban dad flex is refusing to accept human mortality when there is a perfectly good set of heavy-duty jumper cables in the garage. Just give it a little gas. If this does not work, we are tapping the casket with a wrench.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBlack goes to ground, red goes to the sternum\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eWe are not legally responsible for whatever wakes up\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eStill cheaper than an out-of-network ambulance\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlease do not flood the engine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Weird Castle","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":48361294921780,"sku":"85666780728962714588","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":48361294954548,"sku":"10190872571235139000","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Red","offer_id":48361294987316,"sku":"36369950701306666134","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ True Royal","offer_id":48361295020084,"sku":"13079972861004312563","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":48361295052852,"sku":"28340653999746986879","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":48361295085620,"sku":"89816269182091754633","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Navy","offer_id":48361295118388,"sku":"27435874381779066360","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Red","offer_id":48361295151156,"sku":"29896561026172606449","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ True Royal","offer_id":48361295183924,"sku":"69412933142558984483","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":48361295216692,"sku":"98824223659957796429","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":48361295249460,"sku":"23421252440865870743","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Navy","offer_id":48361295282228,"sku":"27134296947535696404","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Red","offer_id":48361295314996,"sku":"16091685268322245344","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ True Royal","offer_id":48361295347764,"sku":"22875682146689317680","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":48361295380532,"sku":"76160378951351022618","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":48361295413300,"sku":"22142590976140243283","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Navy","offer_id":48361295446068,"sku":"10858094626203957484","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Red","offer_id":48361295478836,"sku":"21419405876695893002","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ True Royal","offer_id":48361295511604,"sku":"17073232510478933399","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":48361295544372,"sku":"24912110466522444402","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":48361295577140,"sku":"43435531276030688031","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Navy","offer_id":48361295609908,"sku":"18839434845000814523","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Red","offer_id":48361295642676,"sku":"73130561810951936455","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ True Royal","offer_id":48361295675444,"sku":"26583852123349604024","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":48361295708212,"sku":"10051154184777924063","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/12920571100547409182_2048.jpg?v=1789721435","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/dead-battery-t-shirt","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}