{"product_id":"deep-fried-panic-attack-hoodie-spongebob-squarepants-glowing-eyes","title":"Deep Fried Panic Attack Hoodie — Spongebob Squarepants Glowing Eyes","description":"\u003cp\u003eYour dopamine receptors have flatlined, your attention span is measured in nanoseconds, and your internal monologue is just bass-boosted static. This is a retina-scorching monument to the absolute decay of your brain cells, captured in glorious, deep-fried optical trauma.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSlap the glowing red eyes of the abyss right on your torso. It exists for that exact moment of the day when you witness a take so incomprehensibly bad that your soul violently leaves your body. Let the general public know you are exactly one minor inconvenience away from going totally feral.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDoes not come with ear-shattering audio distortion, you have to make those sounds yourself.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFully incompatible with a healthy sleep schedule or touching grass.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eLegally constitutes psychic damage to anyone making direct eye contact.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Weird Castle","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":67674614988852,"sku":"53035508709994004877","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":67674615152692,"sku":"33248431364557928493","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":67674615316532,"sku":"12403646424705452908","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":67674615480372,"sku":"19155959911903924721","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":67674615611444,"sku":"28093278193094506524","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Alpine Green","offer_id":67674614956084,"sku":"24940068827586687191","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Blue Aqua","offer_id":67674615021620,"sku":"95289387309674567577","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":67674615054388,"sku":"81259911009584898717","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":67674615087156,"sku":"18419346936863795218","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Alpine Green","offer_id":67674615119924,"sku":"44456936872597235248","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Blue Aqua","offer_id":67674615185460,"sku":"31229181563592661896","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":67674615218228,"sku":"26481794560515596013","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Navy","offer_id":67674615250996,"sku":"25579297686739989922","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Alpine Green","offer_id":67674615283764,"sku":"15046250285367831574","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Blue Aqua","offer_id":67674615349300,"sku":"27057494623350870620","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":67674615382068,"sku":"26462304134109636288","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Navy","offer_id":67674615414836,"sku":"30526146115490580986","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Alpine Green","offer_id":67674615447604,"sku":"20709357956019139376","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Blue Aqua","offer_id":67674615513140,"sku":"10697677218101450551","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":67674615545908,"sku":"10608513766574390379","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Navy","offer_id":67674615578676,"sku":"32720341274797036638","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":67674615644212,"sku":"16559869997284654709","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Navy","offer_id":67674615676980,"sku":"19542085800932208921","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/wc-shot-deep-fried-panic-attack-hoodie-spongebob-squarepants-glowing-eyes-0_828d2822-bcab-4acf-a051-b0c558485737.png?v=1792628538","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/deep-fried-panic-attack-hoodie-spongebob-squarepants-glowing-eyes","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}