{"product_id":"diagnosed-having-opinions-tee","title":"Diagnosed: Having Opinions — Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eA warm, nostalgic 1950s doctor's office. Rubber-hose cartoon linework. A beaming housewife. A physician nodding with practiced concern as he scribbles her prescription. Everything is fine. Everything has always been fine. The diagnosis is \u003cstrong\u003eHAVING OPINIONS\u003c\/strong\u003e, and it is rendered with the full bureaucratic sincerity it historically deserved — because this isn't a joke we invented. The DSM literally pathologized female autonomy, nonconformity, and homosexuality well into living memory, and the doctors who wrote those codes were not cartoon villains. They were the institution. That's what makes the cartoon more disturbing than any scream could be.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWear your diagnosis as a badge. The punchline isn't the patient — it's the whole apparatus that needed her sick. Deadpan. Documented. Issued with complete clinical earnestness by Weird Castle Medical Operations, a division of Weird Castle.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDSM-II §302.0\u003c\/strong\u003e — cited in full, for the scholars\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eOnset:\u003c\/strong\u003e puberty (noted in the fine print)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eRecommended treatment:\u003c\/strong\u003e rest and compliance\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrognosis:\u003c\/strong\u003e chronic, if left unchaperoned\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePhysician signature:\u003c\/strong\u003e illegible, as god intended\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSecond opinion:\u003c\/strong\u003e not covered\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":48027615035444,"sku":"64933386064067115299","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":48027615068212,"sku":"24962627730502108425","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":48027615100980,"sku":"15137987860802642831","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":48027615133748,"sku":"19922587540266906921","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":48027615166516,"sku":"11987470457036927153","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":48027615199284,"sku":"93714150569095753240","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":48027615232052,"sku":"23688373973255192903","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":48027615264820,"sku":"99025803551951772244","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":48027615297588,"sku":"25823853203118867245","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":48027615330356,"sku":"23377759646862323297","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/1754957536342211789_2048.jpg?v=1783896207","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/diagnosed-having-opinions-tee","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}