{"product_id":"excruciating-flank-pain-sticker","title":"Excruciating Flank Pain — Sticker","description":"\u003cp\u003eYou know that feeling when a jagged little calcium rock starts tearing its way down your ureter and your only coping mechanism is to dissociate so hard you turn into a 1930s rubber-hose cartoon? We captured that exact vibe. Here is a happy little pixelated star sprinting through the void, completely ignoring the searing, localized agony in the lower left quadrant.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt is the perfect aesthetic for an era where surviving your own body requires a GoFundMe and a three-hour wait in a brightly lit hallway. Slap a giant, dopey smile on your face and just keep tapping your foot while your internal organs stage a violent, bloody revolt. Whistle a cheerful tune! The out-of-network specialist will see you in eight to twelve weeks.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eNot a substitute for actual emergency medical care\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDo not ask the star for a differential diagnosis\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100 percent chance of sweating profusely while smiling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe copay for looking at this graphic is eighty-five dollars\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"3\" × 3\" \/ White","offer_id":48125584932916,"sku":"13767029720544366849","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4\" × 4\" \/ White","offer_id":48125584965684,"sku":"25689253835963947964","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/4728514227366493755_1200.jpg?v=1786231922","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/excruciating-flank-pain-sticker","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}