{"product_id":"inner-beauty-canvas","title":"Inner Beauty — Canvas","description":"\u003cp\u003eForget the juice cleanses and the expensive mindfulness retreats. You want to cultivate what is on the inside? Meet the glamorous, thirty-foot segmented freeloader doing the actual heavy lifting in your digestive tract. She is high-maintenance, she steals half your nutrients, and her contouring is absolutely flawless.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA stunning tribute to the wellness industry's favorite cliché, taken to its logical, biological extreme. Because true beauty isn't just skin deep—it is actively absorbing your lunch while living rent-free in your lower intestine.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDoes not constitute a medically advisable weight-loss strategy.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlease do not feed the talent directly.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eA comforting daily reminder that you are never truly alone.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Weird Castle","offers":[{"title":"0.75'' \/ 11″ x 14″ (Vertical)","offer_id":48242515214388,"sku":"11288018014640361417","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"0.75'' \/ 12″ x 16″ (Vertical)","offer_id":48242515247156,"sku":"24875292078036645973","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"0.75'' \/ 16″ x 20″ (Vertical)","offer_id":48242515279924,"sku":"17904408518720811486","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/7927445266241239664_2048.jpg?v=1787816755","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/inner-beauty-canvas","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}