{"product_id":"mechanically-separated-apex-mug","title":"Mechanically Separated Apex — Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003eYou are a high-value, top-of-the-food-chain lone wolf. You dominate the marketplace and the comments section. Your spirit animal is a terrifying prehistoric beast, which has conveniently been reduced to mechanically separated poultry sludge, bleached, breaded, and frozen in bags of sixty. This is the face of uncompromising power.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eStare deeply into the stoic, breaded visage of a pulverized dinosaur and recognize your own unearned internet confidence. It is a grim reminder that millions of years of terrifying evolutionary dominance ends in a microwave on a paper towel. Assert dominance at the function.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% pure bred alpha energy (contains up to 3% rib meat)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eEvolutionarily optimized for submersion in high-fructose corn syrup\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIf you have to declare you are the apex predator, you are a side dish\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDo not microwave the grindset\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"11oz","offer_id":48102481952820,"sku":"19222251860120354495","price":17.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"15oz","offer_id":48102481985588,"sku":"33217955179231983162","price":17.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/11084596727129066582_2048.jpg?v=1785940375","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/mechanically-separated-apex-mug","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}