{"product_id":"thot-crisis-ii-hoodie-funny-parody","title":"Thot Crisis II Hoodie — Funny Parody","description":"\u003cp\u003eStep up to the cabinet, grab the sticky plastic light gun, and prepare to defend the timeline. The arcade classic gets a high-definition neon wireframe remaster for a modern era where the real tactical espionage action is dodging reply guys and managing your digital footprint.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eRendered in pure 1998 arcade synthwave aesthetics, this masterpiece of quarter-draining nostalgia is built for anyone who knows the true cost of posting through it. Just step on the pedal to hide from reality.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Fine Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlayer 2 has permanently disconnected.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlastic gun smells vaguely of stale beer and regret.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAction pedal stuck in the 'hide' position.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlease insert coin to continue the delusion.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67689992093748,"sku":"21084985350452392959","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ S","offer_id":67689992126516,"sku":"15454285569885286330","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67689992159284,"sku":"19679099770700308218","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ M","offer_id":67689992192052,"sku":"25586174688608471875","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67689992224820,"sku":"25757283052701717309","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ L","offer_id":67689992257588,"sku":"28157898110549801601","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67689992290356,"sku":"22320705624958894274","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ XL","offer_id":67689992323124,"sku":"98983827986615687529","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67689992355892,"sku":"32509307123738634967","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ 2XL","offer_id":67689992388660,"sku":"12870915830743567475","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0653\/7340\/5236\/files\/wc-shot-thot-crisis-ii-hoodie-funny-parody-0_0aebd09a-0726-4821-a5b9-003e1d0ca8b4.png?v=1791690968","url":"https:\/\/weirdcastle.com\/products\/thot-crisis-ii-hoodie-funny-parody","provider":"Weird Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}