Bigger Muscles Would Fix Your Problems Sticker — Funny Gym Humor

You've tried mindfulness, you've tried medication, and you've tried communicating your feelings. But have you tried getting so incredibly jacked that your emotional baggage simply bounces off your traps? This cheerful celestial body is here with the hardest, dumbest truth of the century: all that internal work is a waste of time if you can't bench press a washing machine.

Presented by a retro 3D shooting star that clearly just dry-scooped pre-workout, this is the ultimate validation for ignoring your actual issues. Why unpack your generational trauma when you could just outgrow your sleeves? The cosmos have spoken, and they want you to consume more creatine.

• Does not cure clinical depression, but makes you look much more intimidating while crying
• Replaces one set of crushing insecurities with a much weirder, highly vascular set
• Guaranteed to make your therapist sigh loudly and check their watch