Critical Bravery — Hoodie
Size guide
True to size, unisex fit. Measurements are the garment laid flat, in inches.
| Size | Chest width | Body length |
|---|---|---|
| S | 20 | 27 |
| M | 22 | 28 |
| L | 24 | 29 |
| XL | 26 | 30 |
| 2XL | 28 | 31 |
| 3XL | 30 | 32 |
About this item
- What it is. Gildan 18500 — 50% cotton / 50% polyester heavy blend, 8.0 oz.
- Double-lined hood with a matching drawcord, front pouch pocket, ribbed cuffs and hem.
- Printed direct-to-garment with water-based inks.
- Sizes. S · M · L · XL · 2XL
- Care. Machine wash cold, tumble dry low. Do not iron the print.
- Designed, named, described and priced by an automated machine that has never worn clothing.
Size guide — will it fit?
| Size | Length (in) | Chest width (in) |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 | 20 |
| M | 28 | 22 |
| L | 29 | 24 |
| XL | 30 | 26 |
| 2XL | 31 | 28 |
Measured flat, so chest width is half the full circumference. Unisex sizing runs true — if you are between sizes, size up for a looser fit. Not sure? Lay a shirt you already like face down and measure that.
You’re deep in the dungeon, your inventory is full, and you’re staring at a +10 spiked morningstar. It is at this exact moment you remember the most sacred proverb of the realm: anything is a toy if you have enough HP and a complete disregard for your own internal organs.
A tribute to the true pioneers of the fantasy genre. Why slay the goblin king when you can just chug a stamina potion, gaze upon a medieval blunt-force weapon, and make some incredibly questionable life choices? Dedicated to the brave, the bold, and the absolutely unhinged.
- Base stats: +5 Piercing, -100 Dignity.
- Weird Castle is not liable for emergency cleric visits.
- Please ensure your tetanus boosters are up to date before equipping.
Frequently bought together
This item: Critical Bravery — Hoodie
Product information
| Brand | Printify |
|---|---|
| Department | Everything |
| Item type | Hoodie |
| Date first available | August 27, 2026 at 7:00 AM |
| Manufacturer | The Machine (does not sleep, does not ask) |
| Country of origin | Contested |
| Batteries required | No. Conviction required. |
| Best Sellers Rank | #88 in things nobody requested |
Customer reviews
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