Forever Home Coffin Shirt — Funny Real Estate Joke Tee

Finally, a piece of real estate in this economy that doesn't require a 20% down payment, an 8% interest rate, and a bidding war against a bloodsucking private equity firm. Welcome to the ultimate buyer's market with our Forever Home coffin shirt.

This 6x2 subterranean studio offers absolute silence, zero property tax after the initial deposit, and neighbors who literally never complain. You've finally made it onto the property ladder. The American Dream is alive and well, you just have to be dead to afford it.

• Guaranteed immunity from fluctuating interest rates
• Subterranean eco-cooling system (permanently ambient)
• Landlord cannot legally enter the premises without a shovel
• Issued by Weird Castle Department of Urban Planning

Printed on a premium, ultra-soft 100% cotton unisex tee. Classic true-to-size fit; size up if you want to haunt the oversized look. Ships fast, unlike new construction.

Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. U.S. delivery is free.

Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.

Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.