Gotta Summon 'Em All T-Shirt — Funny Satanic Panic Paganism

In 1999, your youth pastor handed out a photocopied pamphlet warning that trading pocket monsters was a direct, grease-greased slide into the occult. We decided to save everyone a few steps and skip straight to the demonic possession. Choose your new starters: a biblically accurate wheel of eyes, a highly marketable Baphomet, and a cute little deity that demands a blood sacrifice before you can challenge the Elite Four.

It is the ultimate tribute to the Satanic Panic—finally delivering on the promise of 90s youth group propaganda by turning ancient, blood-soaked theology into a cheerful, easily digestible media franchise.

• Evolution stones may require a minor soul contract.
• Do not look directly into the biblically accurate angel's eyes without safety goggles.
• Trading Baphomets across state lines violates at least three papal bulls.
• If your cartridge starts bleeding, blow into it and try again.