Grade A Glue Champion T-Shirt — Vintage Airbrush Racehorse Horse Dark

Behold the absolute pinnacle of equine athleticism, rendered in the slickest, most triumphant 80s airbrush glory imaginable. The wind is in his mane, the crowd is on their feet, and he is proudly wearing the sash of his corporate overlords. He gave it his all on the track, and soon he will give his all to a third-grade macaroni diorama.

Because when you are a finely tuned biological investment, your utility does not end at the finish line. This majestic athlete is enthusiastically endorsing his own sticky, industrial destiny with zero hesitation. You either retire to stud, or you hold together a birdhouse made of popsicle sticks. That is just the business, baby.

• Stronger holding power than most nuclear family units
• Perfect for securing your shoddy woodworking projects
• We do not ask what happened to the runner-up

Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. U.S. delivery is free.

Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.

Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.