Mii Need A Cigarette — Funny Retro Gamer Shirt
- Printed to order in the U.S.
- Tracked to your door
- Free U.S. delivery
- 30-day returns
- A person answers your email
Ships fast, with tracking · Shipping details
Secure Shopify checkout · a person answers your email
About this item
You spent your formative years aggressively swinging a plastic wand at a sensor bar while a sterile, armless bowling-pin person smiled vacantly back at you. Well, the family-friendly wellness era is over, and your digital soul-surrogate is stressed out of its mind.
Rendered in an aggressively glossy 80s chrome airbrush, this funny retro gamer shirt captures the exact moment the avatar drops the virtual tennis racket, walks out of the sanitized white void, and lights up a dart the size of a baseball bat. Reality always wins.
- Does not connect to your balance board
- Nicotine cravings transfer wirelessly via Bluetooth
- Rated M for My God I Need A Minute
- Any similarity to actual persons living, dead, or stored on a 512MB memory card is purely coincidental
A profoundly weird nostalgia tee perfect for casual existential crises, shipping fast to your offline reality.
Shipping & returns
Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. U.S. delivery is free.
Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.
Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.
Size guide
True to size, unisex fit. Measurements are the garment laid flat, in inches.
| Size | Chest width | Body length |
|---|---|---|
| S | 18 | 28 |
| M | 20 | 29 |
| L | 22 | 30 |
| XL | 24 | 31 |
| 2XL | 26 | 32 |
| 3XL | 28 | 33 |