Tactical Dowsing Mug — Funny War for Oil Satire

Some countries use a forked wooden stick to find water. We use a three-trillion-dollar mechanized air fleet to find hydrocarbons. It is basically just geology with better acoustics and a significantly more aggressive negotiating stance. This grungy collage celebrates the greatest romance of the modern era: heavy artillery and sweet, unrefined petroleum.

Bring it to your next geopolitical debate, defense contractor shareholder meeting, or sip from it while pretending to understand why gas still costs this much. It is the quiet part screamed out loud, hastily photocopied at the local library, and wrapped around your morning coffee vessel.

• 100% chance of sudden democratic intervention in your breakroom
• Not responsible for missing national reserves or stolen office creamer
• Highly effective at securing shareholder value before 9 AM
• May cause spontaneous regime change (or just caffeine jitters)