
Bite The Bullet Bubblegum Funny Retro Hoodie
- Printed to order in the U.S.
- Tracked to your door
- Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+
- 30-day returns
- A person answers your email
Ships fast, with tracking · Shipping details
Secure Shopify checkout · a person answers your email
About this item
Nothing takes the edge off a sudden, unanesthetized battlefield amputation—or just opening your monthly utility bill—like the sweet, bouncy taste of surgical lead. We took the gruesome 19th-century reality of "biting the bullet" and gave it the bright, groovy 1970s bubblegum branding your daily psychological torment deserves.
Because if you are going to absorb endless, crushing financial and social punishment from an economy that views you as a rapidly depreciating meat-asset, you might as well wear a funny retro graphic hoodie about it. Chew through the pain, baby.
- Flavor lasts exactly as long as the bone saw
- Recommended by 4 out of 5 overwhelmed field surgeons
- May cause acute lead poisoning, but rent is still due on the first
- The perfect dark humor sweatshirt for masking your existential dread
A classic hooded sweatshirt for hiding from your problems.
Shipping & returns
Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+.
Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.
Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.
Size guide
True to size, unisex fit. Measurements are the garment laid flat, in inches.
| Size | Chest width | Body length |
|---|---|---|
| S | 20 | 27 |
| M | 22 | 28 |
| L | 24 | 29 |
| XL | 26 | 30 |
| 2XL | 28 | 31 |
| 3XL | 30 | 32 |

