Continued Operations Prescription Shirt — Funny Dystopian Tee
Printed to order · arrives in 5–12 days in the U.S. · free delivery
30-day returns · secure Shopify checkout · a human answers questions
About this item
Your prescription has been processed. The Office of Sustained Output, Dept. of Functional Continuity has reviewed your file and determined you meet the minimum threshold for continued participation. This bottle contains your allotted supply of Continued Operations™ — a dystopian graphic tee indicated for adults experiencing sustained exposure to late-stage economic conditions, recursive performance reviews, and the ambient dread of being a human resource. Refills are automatic. Opting out is not a covered benefit.
The label does not lie. You already knew this was a prescription, you've been taking it your whole life. Now it comes in a funny anti-capitalist shirt.
- Issuing Authority: Dept. of Functional Continuity
- Dosage: Wear as needed to remain viable
- Indication: Participation in the economy
- Side effects: Compliance, exhaustion, occasional LinkedIn post
- Contraindications: Dignity, leisure, sufficient housing
Printed on a 100% combed cotton unisex t-shirt. Ships fast, fits true to size, and provides mild comfort during total systemic collapse.
Shipping & returns
Everything is printed to order — your item is made after you buy it. Production takes 2–7 business days, then 3–5 in transit (U.S.) or 10–20 international. Most U.S. orders arrive within 5–12 days, with tracking emailed when it ships.
Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy.