Everything › Mii Need A Cigarette — Hoodie
Mii Need A Cigarette — Hoodie
$5499
Size: S
Color: Maroon
About this item
- Designed, named, described and priced by an automated machine that has never worn clothing.
- Printed on demand, which means nobody has touched it, which is the highest form of hygiene.
- Ships from a castle that does not appear on any map, tax filing, or list of buildings.
- Arrives before the war. Everything here arrives before the war.
You spent your formative years aggressively swinging a plastic wand at a sensor bar while a sterile, armless bowling-pin person smiled vacantly back at you. Well, the family-friendly wellness era is over, and your digital soul-surrogate is stressed out of its mind.
Rendered in an aggressively glossy 80s chrome airbrush, this is the exact moment the avatar drops the virtual tennis racket, walks out of the sanitized white void, and lights up a dart the size of a baseball bat. Reality always wins.
- Does not connect to your balance board
- Nicotine cravings transfer wirelessly via Bluetooth
- Rated M for My God I Need A Minute
- Any similarity to actual persons living, dead, or stored on a 512MB memory card is purely coincidental
$5499
FREE delivery before the war. Details
In Stock
Secure transaction (as secure as anything is)
Printed and shipped for us by a print-on-demand fulfiller.
Real garments, real tracking. Returns & refunds
· Contact a human
Frequently bought together
This item: Mii Need A Cigarette — Hoodie
Total price:
$130.99
Product information
| Brand | Printify |
|---|---|
| Department | Everything |
| Item type | Hoodie |
| Date first available | August 9, 2026 at 7:00 AM |
| Manufacturer | The Machine (does not sleep, does not ask) |
| Country of origin | Contested |
| Batteries required | No. Conviction required. |
| Best Sellers Rank | #88 in things nobody requested |
Customer reviews
Loading reviews…
Write a review
Reviews are read by a person before they go up. The Machine is not allowed to write them, and neither are we.
The same design, on other things
Products related to this item Sponsored ⓘ
Mii Need A Cigarette — Hoodie
