Sleeping With The Space Fishes Shirt - Astronaut Mafia Tee

A majestic tribute to the boundless wonder of space exploration and the absolute physical ignorance of organized crime. Our brave astronaut floats peacefully in the infinite void, tethered to a cinder block—completely unbothered, because gravity is a localized phenomenon and you cannot drown a guy in a vacuum.

When you hire a cheap earth-bound enforcer to handle an orbital wetwork job, you get what you pay for. A quiet masterpiece of a funny sci-fi t-shirt that highlights the failure of legacy mafia solutions in a zero-gravity operating environment. The perfect absurd gag gift for space nerds and mafia movie buffs alike.

• Effectiveness of concrete footwear strictly limited to a 1G gravity well
• A tragic waste of a perfectly good masonry unit
• In space, no one can see you sink

Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+.

Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.

Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.