100% Genuine Battle Freaks Sticker — Funny Pokemon Parody

Welcome back to the discount toy aisle of 1998, where the plastics gave you a headache and the mascots looked like they had a violent criminal record. We skipped the beloved franchise entirely to bring you the monsters your grandmother accidentally bought you for your birthday, 100% genuine according to the box.

Featuring a jaundiced rat burdened with human ears and a miserable turtle carrying a cinderblock, this aggressively confident Pokémon parody artwork captures the deeply unsettling energy of a factory trying to guess what western children want, and getting it horribly, hilariously wrong.

The fine print:

• Do not make direct eye contact with the yellow rodent.
• 100% genuine merchandise of a franchise that does not exist.
• Will immediately forfeit any battle against a licensed cease-and-desist.
• Evolves strictly into a protracted trademark dispute.
• A parody. Not affiliated with or endorsed by Pokémon, which is extremely obvious from the turtle.

Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+.

Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.

Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.