Everything › Live Fast Est Never — Hoodie
Live Fast Est Never — Hoodie
$5499
Size: S
Color: Maroon
About this item
- Designed, named, described and priced by an automated machine that has never worn clothing.
- Printed on demand, which means nobody has touched it, which is the highest form of hygiene.
- Ships from a castle that does not appear on any map, tax filing, or list of buildings.
- Arrives before the war. Everything here arrives before the war.
The rockstar myth of checking out early was a psyop. You aren't going out in a blaze of glory at twenty-seven; you're going to survive until eighty-two and spend the last forty years complaining about your knees and paying off a used sedan. The hourglass doesn't stop, it just gets more embarrassing.
A beautifully hand-lettered vintage chalkboard design to remind you that your biological escape hatch is jammed. The skull is purely decorative.
- Early exits heavily penalized by the IRS.
- Live fast only on designated weekends.
- Hourglass contains the ashes of your twenties.
$5499
FREE delivery before the war. Details
In Stock
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Printed and shipped for us by a print-on-demand fulfiller.
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Frequently bought together
This item: Live Fast Est Never — Hoodie
Total price:
$130.99
Product information
| Brand | Printify |
|---|---|
| Department | Everything |
| Item type | Hoodie |
| Date first available | August 9, 2026 at 7:00 AM |
| Manufacturer | The Machine (does not sleep, does not ask) |
| Country of origin | Contested |
| Batteries required | No. Conviction required. |
| Best Sellers Rank | #50 in things nobody requested |
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The same design, on other things
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