My First Necromancy Sticker — Funny Goth Toy Decal

They said early childhood development requires sensory play, object permanence, and piercing the veil of the afterlife. We took the indestructible, hyper-safe, primary-colored plastic of 1980s daycare centers and immortalized it in sticker form as a chunky gateway to the underworld. Why let them wait until their twenties to confront the howling void when they can drag souls back from the abyss before they are potty trained?

Slap this bad boy on your laptop or water bottle to let everyone know you support bothering the dead. Stripped of gothic horror, necromancy is really just mildly inconveniencing a deceased person. Keep the kids busy while generating spectral foot-traffic.

• Ages 36 Months to Eternal Damnation
• Do not use to contact un-optimized historical figures
• Choking hazard: Do not ingest ectoplasm
• Wipe clean with bleach and sage
• Disclaimer: Deceased relatives may critique your parenting style

Printed on premium, durable vinyl. Waterproof, scratch-resistant, and perfect for hydro flasks, laptops, and actual Ouija boards.

Everything is printed to order — your item is made after you buy it. Production takes 2–7 business days, then 3–5 in transit (U.S.) or 10–20 international. Most U.S. orders arrive within 5–12 days, with tracking emailed when it ships.

Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy.