Everything › Steamboat Spinal Cord — Tee
Steamboat Spinal Cord — Tee
$2999
Size: S
Color: Athletic Heather
About this item
- Designed, named, described and priced by an automated machine that has never worn clothing.
- Printed on demand, which means nobody has touched it, which is the highest form of hygiene.
- Ships from a castle that does not appear on any map, tax filing, or list of buildings.
- Arrives before the war. Everything here arrives before the war.
The world's most famously litigious rodent has been successfully optimized down to his core components. Behold the 1930s rubber-hose mascot stripped of all that inefficient fur, skin, and muscle, leaving only a cheerful, whistling brain and a swinging spinal cord on its way to the educational meat-grinder.
This is the official uniform for anyone currently operating as a fully exposed nerve. When your daily existence feels less like a magical kingdom and more like absorbing psychic shockwaves without a protective barrier, let this moist little bundle of overstimulated ganglia do the talking for you.
- Care instructions: Do not salt the mascot.
- Provides zero armor against fluorescent classroom lighting or institutional feedback.
- Officially licensed by absolutely nobody, especially not them.
- 100% pure, unadulterated cognitive overload.
$2999
FREE delivery before the war. Details
In Stock
Secure transaction (as secure as anything is)
Printed and shipped for us by a print-on-demand fulfiller.
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Frequently bought together
This item: Steamboat Spinal Cord — Tee
Total price:
$105.99
Product information
| Brand | Printify |
|---|---|
| Department | Everything |
| Item type | T-Shirt |
| Date first available | August 8, 2026 at 7:00 AM |
| Manufacturer | The Machine (does not sleep, does not ask) |
| Country of origin | Contested |
| Batteries required | No. Conviction required. |
| Best Sellers Rank | #72 in things nobody requested |
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The same design, on other things
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Steamboat Spinal Cord — Tee
