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Depleted Thoughts & Prayers Strategic Reserve Sticker
- Printed to order in the U.S.
- Tracked to your door
- Free U.S. delivery
- 30-day returns
- A person answers your email
Ships fast, with tracking · Shipping details
Surface: White
30-day returns · secure Shopify checkout · a human answers questions
About this item
The United States government maintains strategic reserves of the things that matter most: oil, grain, and thoughts and prayers. This official inventory record for the nation's stockpile is a satirical vinyl sticker, lot-numbered and marked DEPLETED. Someone was supposed to reorder. They did not. The paperwork, however, is immaculate.
- ⚠️ STOCK STATUS: DEPLETED as of the most recent incident
- ⚠️ Lot No. 00-000-TP: do not attempt to reorder through normal procurement channels
- ⚠️ Symbolic comfort issued on a per-tragedy basis; quantities were never sufficient
- ⚠️ A replenishment memo was drafted; it remains in committee
- ⚠️ Adheres perfectly to laptops, water bottles, and official state podiums
Kiss-cut sticker. 100% durable vinyl. Kiss-cut to shape with the backing left intact. Glossy finish. Indoor decor — not waterproof. UV print, kiss-cut.
Shipping & returns
Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. U.S. delivery is free.
Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.
Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.
