Strategic Reserve: Thoughts & Prayers Depleted Mug
- Printed to order in the U.S.
- Tracked to your door
- Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+
- 30-day returns
- A person answers your email
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Size: 11oz
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About this item
The government maintains strategic reserves of what matters most—oil, grain, and empty platitudes. This is the official inventory record for the nation's Thoughts & Prayers stockpile: lot-numbered, rubber-hose-cartoon-rendered in loving bureaucratic detail, filed correctly, and marked DEPLETED. Someone was supposed to reorder. They did not. The paperwork, however, is immaculate. Deadpan-institutional critique on a funny dark humor coffee mug. The horror isn't that it ran out; it's that it was managed by a department.
- ⚠️ STOCK STATUS: DEPLETED as of the most recent incident
- ⚠️ Lot No. 00-000-TP: do not attempt to reorder through normal procurement channels
- ⚠️ Symbolic comfort issued on a per-tragedy basis; quantities were never sufficient
- ⚠️ A replenishment memo was drafted; it remains in committee
- ⚠️ Perfect political satire gift for chronically online news junkies
Ceramic mug. White ceramic. 11oz (0.33 l). Rounded corners. C-handle. Dye-sublimation print.
Shipping & returns
Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+.
Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.
Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.
