
Previously Functional Hat — Funny Burnout Trucker Cap
- Printed to order in the U.S.
- Tracked to your door
- Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+
- 30-day returns
- A person answers your email
Ships fast, with tracking · Shipping details
Size: One size
Secure Shopify checkout · a person answers your email
About this item
Most industrial machinery gets a bright red tag when the gears finally grind to a halt. Humans just get an iced coffee and a Slack message asking for a quick sync. We bypassed the corporate wellness seminar entirely and issued this standard-issue decommissioning notice for your central nervous system. This funny burnout trucker cap is not a cry for help; it is a matter of public safety. You used to work. Now you do not.
Designed to resemble a sterile mid-century factory inspection label, this printed cap is the most efficient way to communicate that your warranty expired sometime in 2019 and the replacement parts are currently stuck in a global supply chain bottleneck.
- Approved for total systemic failure and structural collapse.
- Do not attempt to reboot wearer with pizza parties or mindfulness apps.
- Factory reset impossible without a time machine and a trust fund.
- Certified structurally unsound for late-stage capitalism.
Yupoong 6606 retro trucker cap. 74% polyester, 26% cotton. Mid profile, six-panel structured snapback. Permacurv® visor. Mesh back. DTF (direct-to-film) print, front panel.
Shipping & returns
Everything is printed to order by our manufacturing partners, mainly in the United States — your item is made after you buy it, then shipped fast with tracking emailed the moment it leaves the printer. Free U.S. shipping on orders $20+.
Production and transit times are published as separate numbers in the shipping policy, so you can check them before you buy.
Returns are accepted for 30 days from delivery — see the refund policy. Questions go to a person, not a ticket robot: contact us.

