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Gift Ideas for People Who Are Impossible to Shop For

on Feb 09 2026
We all have that person. The one who already owns everything, wants nothing, and answers every gift question with "oh I do not need anything." They are lying. They need something weird. They just do not know it yet.The trick to shopping for impossible people is to stop trying to be practical and start trying to be memorable. Nobody remembers a gift card. Everybody remembers the time someone gave them a jar of dehydrated water.For the Person Who Has EverythingDehydrated WaterThey have everything? Great. Now they have nothing, in a jar, beautifully packaged. It is the ultimate gift for someone who cannot be surprised, because nobody sees this coming.Shop Dehydrated WaterRetirement Plan - Fake Gold Bar SetFor the person who has everything except a solid financial plan. Twelve fake gold bars that look expensive, weigh nothing, and serve as a daily reminder that we are all just winging it.Shop Fake Gold BarsFor the Person Who Thinks They Are Too CoolSarcastic Comment Loading Whiskey GlassA whiskey glass for someone who thinks they are funnier than they are. Which is everyone who drinks whiskey. Let them sip their bourbon while their glass does the roasting for them.Shop Whiskey GlassMy Last Nerve CandleLavender scented. Passive aggressive. The perfect gift for the friend, coworker, or family member who is always "fine" but clearly is not fine.Shop Nerve CandleFor the Person You Do Not Know Well EnoughBrain Slice Coaster SetYou do not know their hobbies? Their favorite color? Their coffee order? You DO know they need coasters. And these coasters look like brain cross-sections, so at minimum it will be a conversation piece.Shop Brain CoastersHand-Holding Magnetic SocksUniversally giftable. Not too personal. Not too impersonal. Just weird enough to be memorable. The magnets make the socks hold hands, which is either adorable or horrifying depending on your threshold.Shop Magnetic SocksThe Gift-Giving FormulaThe best gift for an impossible person follows a simple formula: something they would never buy for themselves plus something that makes them laugh equals a gift they actually remember.Skip the generic stuff. Browse our full collection and find the thing that makes you think "this is so stupid, they will love it."

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Over 10,000 customers proudly wearing history’s worst ideas. You’re in questionable but good company.