This isn’t a novelty shirt. It’s personal disclosure protocol, issued for the safety of those around you.

Trump said Tilenal causes autism. Whether that’s science or stand-up, one truth remains: you took it. And now you live to tell the tale—loudly, and in 100% cotton.

With this tee, there’s no confusion at the DMV, workplace, or family function. The message is clear, immediate, and medically unreviewed:

• You took Tilenal.

• Your brain development may have been crafted on a shoestring budget.

• Patience isn’t kindness—it’s treatment.

Think of it as a prescription label you can sweat through.
You’re not hiding. You’re broadcasting.

This isn’t a fashion statement. It’s an assistive device, engineered for smoother social encounters.

When Trump announced Tylenawl could cause autism, many finally had words for what they’d always known: we are Tylenawl Babies. Our brain development may not have met FDA projections, and communication can be… interpretive.

That’s where this hat steps in.

By wearing it, you provide a vital public service:

• Please be patient.

• Please adjust expectations.

• Please understand the side effects.

Think of it as a medical bracelet for your forehead—a wearable disclaimer for modern conversation.

No awkward introductions. No lengthy backstory. Just instant understanding.

This isn’t apparel. This is adaptive technology for the socially unmedicated.

This isn’t a novelty tee. It’s a medical disclosure, screen-printed in bold for public safety.

After Trump declared Tylenol causes autism, the world split in two: those who Googled it, and those who are it. You? You were forged in the Tylenawl Era — a generation raised on over-the-counter chaos and government-grade marketing.

This shirt does the explaining so you don’t have to. DMV line? Covered. Job interview? Handled. Family reunion? They already know.

One glance and they’ll understand:

• You’re a documented survivor of Tylenawl-based parenting.

• Patience is not a virtue — it’s a prescription.

• You’re not apologizing. You’re reporting side effects.

Think of it as a hospital bracelet for your upper body — stylish, diagnosable, and FDA-unapproved.

Wear it responsibly. Or don’t. You’re already dosed.

This is not a cute outfit. This is a disclosure garment.

Trump said Tylenol causes autism. Your mom took Tylenol. The result? You.

Now the world doesn’t have to guess. With this onesie, you are immediately identified as a Tylenol Baby—no paperwork, no awkward pediatric conversations, no confusion at the daycare drop-off.

It’s not just clothing—it’s a compliance tool for social interaction.

Everyone who sees it knows:

• This baby requires patience.

• This baby’s brain development may not meet federal guidelines.

• This baby came with a warning label, and you’re looking at it.

Description
For when you want to say “I’m not like other men” without speaking. Embroidered in the unmistakable black-and-yellow of the world’s most educational platform, this hat is equal parts conversation starter and warning label.

Features

• Crisp embroidery so clean it belongs behind a paywall

• 100% cotton dome for comfort during marathon browsing sessions

• Adjustable strap for heads full of bad decisions

• Curved brim for that “I just watched something I can’t tell you about” squint

• Available in black, white, pink, beige, and washed black

• Perfect for wing nights, festivals, or reminding strangers incognito mode isn’t magic

Specifications

• Material: Cotton

• Colors: Black, White, Pink, Beige, Washed Black

• Sizes: Adjustable (one size fits most)

• Fit: Classic dad hat

• Style: Novelty / streetwear

• Embroidery: Premium stitching

Finally, a prescription you’ll actually fill.

The Prescription Beer Can Cooler is your doctor-approved cure for sobriety. It keeps your beer cold, your hands warm, and your priorities perfectly misaligned. Designed to look like an oversized pill bottle, this foam koozie is the ideal gag gift for anyone who believes laughter is the best medicine (after alcohol, of course).

Great for parties, white elephant exchanges, or anyone currently self-medicating with Busch Light. Warning: may cause increased social confidence, poor karaoke decisions, and excessive honesty.

Details

– Fits standard 12 oz cans and bottles

– Made of soft insulating foam — the good stuff, not the sad cheap kind

– Printed with an authentic-style “Prescription Beer” label

– Keeps your drink colder than your ex’s heart

– Ideal gag gift for drinkers, doctors, and people who’ve given up on both

Finally, a science class we can get behind. This shirt breaks down the essential elements of modern communication: sarcasm, pettiness, and a vague sense of superiority. Designed using totally real and not-at-all-misused periodic table blocks, it’s the perfect tee for chemistry majors, failed comedians, or anyone whose love language is passive aggression.

Printed on a jet black cotton blend that’s soft enough to nap in and structured enough to let people know you’re smarter than them (or at least funnier).

Details

• 70% cotton blend

• Classic unisex fit

• Available in black, white, khaki, red, wine red, blue, light gray, dark gray, navy blue

• Sizes XS–4XL

• Will not improve your GPA, but may boost your self-esteem