Professionalism from the ankles up.

Introducing the This Meeting Is Bullshit Socks — the only form of corporate protest HR can’t confiscate. Designed for maximum comfort during minimum productivity, these socks whisper your true feelings while your face pretends to care.

Perfect for 9 a.m. syncs, mandatory “team bonding,” and pretending your camera is off during Zooms.

Details

– Compression fit for improved circulation (of rage)

– Non-slip comfort for endless standing meetings

– Breathable blend for when your soul’s suffocating

– Machine washable, emotionally irreversible

– Fits all genders, fits no patience

A shirt so questionable, it’s practically performance art.

The Optical Illusion Bust Tee is a throwback to an era when “3D design” meant confusing everyone at the barbecue. Featuring a hilariously bad illusion of cleavage, this shirt is your go-to for getting double takes, awkward laughs, and a few “bro… what?” reactions.

It’s the perfect mix of cursed design and chaotic energy — ideal for prank gifts, bachelor parties, or anyone whose sense of humor peaked in 2018.

Details

– 95% cotton, 5% “why does this exist?”

– Unisex fit (wear it ironically, please)

– Lightweight and breathable — unlike the tension it creates

– Machine washable, but dignity sold separately

– Available in white only (because of course it is)

For the ones who have mastered the art of doing absolutely nothing — beautifully.

The Bored to Death Hoodie features a skeleton sprawled on the couch, giving up on productivity and embracing the eternal lounge. It’s the perfect fit for nights spent contemplating the void, watching 17 episodes in a row, or pretending to meditate while doomscrolling.

Comfy, morbid, and mildly therapeutic. Death has never looked this cozy.

Details

– Soft cotton/poly blend that feels like giving up in comfort

– Unisex fit: oversized enough to hide from your responsibilities

– Printed design won’t fade (unlike your motivation)

– Front pocket for snacks or existential dread

– Machine washable — because you still have to exist in society sometimes

For when you’ve had it with bad vibes, toxic people, and Mercury’s bullshit.

The Return to Sender Sweatshirt says what your aura’s been screaming all year: “Take your negativity somewhere else.” Perfect for sipping tea while ignoring texts, staging your apartment, or hexing your ex from a safe emotional distance.

Made with soft cotton and passive-aggressive enlightenment, this cozy crewneck helps you manifest peace — or at least look peaceful while plotting revenge.

Details

– 100% cotton fleece blend (soft like good karma)

– Unisex fit for witches, skeptics, and everyone in between

– Features a printed evil eye for built-in emotional armor

– Machine washable (sage optional)

– Available in black, navy, white, yellow, and pink

For anyone who’s ever said, “I’ll get my life together tomorrow”… and then didn’t.

The Trying to Get My Shit Together Cat Tee is your new emotional support shirt — featuring one exhausted feline doing its absolute best in the litter box of life. Soft, lightweight, and stupidly relatable, this tee turns your burnout into a punchline and your midlife crisis into wearable art.

Perfect for cat lovers, chronic overthinkers, and anyone currently pretending to be “fine.”

Details

– 100% cotton, soft enough to cry into

– Unisex fit for maximum shared suffering

– Machine washable (like your dreams)

– Printed with non-toxic inks that survive your 3rd mental breakdown

– Available in multiple sizes for all levels of chaos

A hat for women who believe in gender roles — specifically, the one where he pays.

The Put It On My Husband’s Tab Hat is a red-and-white statement piece that says “I don’t check prices, I check vibes.” Perfect for date nights, brunches, and budget meetings you don’t plan on attending.

It’s bold. It’s bratty. It’s the modern-day dowry — embroidered in retro lettering and powered by financial delusion. Wear it to let everyone know your man handles the bill while you handle the attention.

Whether you’re married, divorced, or just emotionally sponsored, this hat works harder than your credit card ever will.

Details

• Classic two-tone trucker style – breathable mesh for high-limit lifestyles
• Adjustable snapback – fits most heads and all financial dependencies
• Embroidered “PUT IT ON MY HUSBAND’S TAB” text – loud, proud, and tax-deductible (probably)
• Made from polyester and poor impulse control
• Lightweight design – for when you’re carrying emotional baggage, not financial

You ever been abducted by a UFO mid-therapy breakthrough while cross-legged in a field of unresolved issues? You have now.

This shirt is for the girlies, the goblins, and the fully boned-out husks of humanity who turned their childhood trauma into tight five stand-up sets and a vape addiction.

She’s not coping. She’s content.

He’s not okay. He’s got a rainbow beam in his soul and a sarcastic tone in his bones.

You wear this and you become unemployably hilarious.

• Skeleton? Check.

• Alien tractor beam? Check.

• Rainbow portal to your inner pain-clown? Double check.

Perfect for:

• Late-night overshares

• Making therapists laugh

• Laughing at the void

• Looking hot while spiraling

Details:

• 100% cotton, won’t dissolve in your tears

• Unisex fit, because everyone’s broken

• Screen printed graphic (like a sticker on your trauma)

• Runs true to size. Emotionally? Who’s to say.