Diagnosed: Having Opinions — Tee
$29.99
Unit price per
Kindly, Ignore this.
You’re not gonna *not* click this, right?
Diagnosed: Having Opinions — Tee
In stock - Ready to be shipped
Estimated delivery between July 16 and July 18.
$29.99
Unit price perA warm, nostalgic 1950s doctor's office. Rubber-hose cartoon linework. A beaming housewife. A physician nodding with practiced concern as he scribbles her prescription. Everything is fine. Everything has always been fine. The diagnosis is HAVING OPINIONS, and it is rendered with the full bureaucratic sincerity it historically deserved — because this isn't a joke we invented. The DSM literally pathologized female autonomy, nonconformity, and homosexuality well into living memory, and the doctors who wrote those codes were not cartoon villains. They were the institution. That's what makes the cartoon more disturbing than any scream could be.
Wear your diagnosis as a badge. The punchline isn't the patient — it's the whole apparatus that needed her sick. Deadpan. Documented. Issued with complete clinical earnestness by Weird Castle Medical Operations, a division of Weird Castle.
- DSM-II §302.0 — cited in full, for the scholars
- Onset: puberty (noted in the fine print)
- Recommended treatment: rest and compliance
- Prognosis: chronic, if left unchaperoned
- Physician signature: illegible, as god intended
- Second opinion: not covered
You’re not buying a joke, you’re buying a well-made product with a joke on it. Quality that won’t make you question your life choices.
We accept returns and exchanges within 30 days of delivery.
Items must be unworn, unwashed, and still capable of starting arguments.
If something’s off, email us with your order number and we’ll make it right, no weird hoops to jump through.
Pay with
Your transaction is protected with advanced security measures to keep your information confidential
Diagnosed: Having Opinions — Tee
Built to Turn Heads. Designed to Last.
High-quality materials, bold designs, and fast U.S. shipping. Every piece we sell is made to get noticed and worn again and again.
FAQs
Yep. Real products, real shipping, real weird.
We print and ship everything from our U.S.-based fulfillment partners — no AI hallucinations involved.
Most apparel runs from XS to 3XL, depending on the product.
Size charts are listed on each item, but if you're between sizes, we recommend sizing up (especially if you’ve been hitting the gym or the fridge).
Email us anytime at weirdcastlecrew@gmail.com
We’re small but scrappy — someone human will get back to you within 1–2 business days, possibly faster if we’re not arguing about fonts.
Sometimes, yes.
Limited-run drops and trending products can disappear fast. If you see something you love, don’t wait — we might never bring it back.
Delivery, Returns, Exchanges and Guarantee
Orders usually ship within 1–3 business days, with delivery times depending on your location.
U.S. orders typically arrive in 3–7 days after fulfillment. You'll get a tracking number as soon as it’s on the move.
Not yet — but we’re working on it.
For now, Weird Castle only ships within the U.S. (though our chaos knows no borders).
You’ve got 30 days to return or exchange an item.
As long as it’s unworn, unwashed, and not covered in BBQ sauce, we’ll take it back.
Email us with your order number to get started.
Absolutely.
If your item arrives damaged or misprinted, we’ll replace it or issue a refund — no drama. Just email us a photo and your order number so we can fix it fast.