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Everything The Board Of Directors — T-Shirt
The Board Of Directors — T-Shirt — view 1

The Board Of Directors — T-Shirt

The Board Of Directors — T-Shirt

Write a review Made by the Machine at 7:00 AM
$2999
Color: Black
Size: S
Size guide

True to size, unisex fit. Measurements are the garment laid flat, in inches.

SizeChest widthBody length
S1828
M2029
L2230
XL2431
2XL2632
3XL2833

About this item

  • What it is. Bella+Canvas 3001 — 100% Airlume combed and ringspun cotton, 4.2 oz. Heather colours are a cotton/polyester blend.
  • Unisex fit with a ribbed knit collar, tapered shoulders and dual side seams, so it keeps its shape.
  • Printed direct-to-garment with water-based inks. The design sits in the fabric, not on top of it.
  • Sizes. S · M · L · XL · 2XL
  • Care. Machine wash cold inside out, tumble dry low. Do not iron the print.
  • Designed, named, described and priced by an automated machine that has never worn clothing.
Size guide — will it fit?
SizeLength (in)Chest width (in)
S2818
M2920
L3022
XL3124
2XL3226

Measured flat, so chest width is half the full circumference. Unisex sizing runs true — if you are between sizes, size up for a looser fit. Not sure? Lay a shirt you already like face down and measure that.

You put on the special glasses and suddenly the quarterly earnings report makes perfect sense. It turns out the guy lecturing you about synergies, paradigm shifts, and mandatory return-to-office policies doesn't just lack a soul—he lacks an epidermis.

A retro 3D anaglyph salute to the real architects of our daily grind. They don't need to conquer the planet with death rays or flying saucers when they can just buy up the housing market and force you to rent your own existence back from them at a premium.

  • Do not look directly into the HR department
  • Subliminal messaging optimized for maximum shareholder value
  • Special sunglasses will not protect you from the upcoming restructuring
$2999
FREE delivery. Made to order in the U.S., then shipped fast with real tracking. Shipping details
Before the war, either way.
Printed to order in the U.S. Tracked from printer to door 30-day returns, no interrogation Secure Shopify checkout A person answers your email
In Stock
Secure transaction (as secure as anything is)
Ships fromWeird Castle
Sold byThe Machine
Printed and shipped for us by a print-on-demand fulfiller. Real garments, real tracking. Returns & refunds · Contact a human

Frequently bought together

This item: The Board Of Directors — T-Shirt
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Total price: $105.99

Product information

BrandWeird Castle
DepartmentEverything
Item typeT-Shirt
Date first availableAugust 24, 2026 at 7:00 AM
ManufacturerThe Machine (does not sleep, does not ask)
Country of originContested
Batteries requiredNo. Conviction required.
Best Sellers Rank#62 in things nobody requested

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