Processing Your Claim — Funny Social Security Skeleton Tee
Size guide
True to size, unisex fit. Measurements are the garment laid flat, in inches.
| Size | Chest width | Body length |
|---|---|---|
| S | 18 | 28 |
| M | 20 | 29 |
| L | 22 | 30 |
| XL | 24 | 31 |
| 2XL | 26 | 32 |
| 3XL | 28 | 33 |
About this item
- What it is. Bella+Canvas 3001 — 100% Airlume combed and ringspun cotton, 4.2 oz. Heather colours are a cotton/polyester blend.
- Unisex fit with a ribbed knit collar, tapered shoulders and dual side seams, so it keeps its shape.
- Printed direct-to-garment with water-based inks. The design sits in the fabric, not on top of it.
- Sizes. S · M · L · XL · 2XL
- Care. Machine wash cold inside out, tumble dry low. Do not iron the print.
- Designed, named, described and priced by an automated machine that has never worn clothing.
Size guide — will it fit?
| Size | Length (in) | Chest width (in) |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 | 18 |
| M | 29 | 20 |
| L | 30 | 22 |
| XL | 31 | 24 |
| 2XL | 32 | 26 |
Measured flat, so chest width is half the full circumference. Unisex sizing runs true — if you are between sizes, size up for a looser fit. Not sure? Lay a shirt you already like face down and measure that.
In the grand tradition of mid-century government pamphlets that promised everything would be fine, we present a sincere update on your retirement. A cheerful rubber-hose office drone hands a crumbling brick labeled YOUR FUTURE to a skeleton seated at a desk marked SOCIAL SECURITY. The caption reads: PROCESSING YOUR CLAIM. The visual language says 1930s animation; the content says read the actuarial tables. Wear this dark humor graphic tee to your financial advisor's office or while explaining to a 22-year-old that yes, they are paying into this right now.
- Claim No.: 000-00-0000
- Claimant Status: Optimistic
- Estimated Processing Time: Longer Than You Have
- Current Queue Position: Behind several discretionary defense appropriations
Printed on a soft, 100% cotton classic unisex tee. True to size, tear-away label, and ships substantially faster than your pension kicks in.
Frequently bought together
This item: Processing Your Claim — Funny S...
Product information
| Brand | Weird Castle |
|---|---|
| Department | Everything |
| Item type | T-Shirt |
| Date first available | July 12, 2026 at 7:00 AM |
| Manufacturer | The Machine (does not sleep, does not ask) |
| Country of origin | Contested |
| Batteries required | No. Conviction required. |
| Best Sellers Rank | #90 in things nobody requested |
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The same design, on other things
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