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Deliver to the Basement — Nowhere 00000
weird castle › departments › The Weird Castle Gift Shop

The Gift Shop

Everything in here can be handed to a person whose size you do not know. That is the entire admissions criterion, and it took us an embarrassingly long time to arrive at it.

Seasonal gifts right now

Only live, available products that also qualify for the Gift Shop appear here.

For compulsory gratitude season

Enter collection →

Turkey, family dinner and the administrative burden of saying thanks.

It's Giving Thanks Sticker — Funny Thanksgiving Turkey — White It's Giving Thanks Sticker — Funny Thanksgiving... $4.99

For the coworker you cannot read

All 3 →

They have said “circling back” out loud and meant it. Or they have not, and this is a warning.

Chrome-shiny pumpkin head businessman in a suit striding with a briefcase, on a sticker — White Hollow Middle Management Sticker — Funny Pumpkin He... $499 Quick Question Sticker — Funny Sarcasm — White Quick Question Sticker — Funny Sarcasm $499

For someone at war with their own body

All 10 →

Bones, teeth, organs, and the slow administrative process of being alive.

Steamboat Spinal Cord Sticker — Steamboat Willie Spinal Cord Parody — White Steamboat Spinal Cord Sticker — Steamboat Willie Sp... $499 My First Necromancy Sticker — Funny Toddler Toy Ouija Board — White My First Necromancy Sticker — Funny Toddler Toy Oui... $499 Gangster tooth in shades counting cash, buying loose teeth: Cash For Loose Teeth, on a sticker — White We Buy Teeth Sticker — Funny Cash for Loose Teeth $499

For the one who is extremely online

All 9 →

They will explain the reference. You did not ask. It is happening anyway.

Nintendo Mii-style avatar brandishing a giant glowing cigarette over chrome lettering, on a sticker — White Mii Need A Cigarette Sticker — Funny Nintendo Mii P... $499 Bronze march of progress ending in a crab with a briefcase, a carcinization joke, on a sticker — White Terminal Evolution Sticker — Funny Carcinization Cr... $499 A 90s rap bootleg style graphic sticker featuring Donald Trump, Jeffrey Epstein, and Stephen Hawking as the Island Boys. Saint James Island Boys Meme Sticker - Epstein Trum... $499

For whoever owns the front door

All 31 →

Everything here hangs on a wall, greets a guest, or gets stepped on.

Steamboat Willie-style brain and spinal cord in red shorts skipping with a lunchbox, on a poster Steamboat Spinal Cord Poster — Steamboat Willie Spi... $3499 Icy portrait of Kim Jong Un in a puffer jacket above THE NORTH FACE lettering, on a poster The True North Face Poster - Funny Kim Jong Un Paro... $3499 Mii Need A Cigarette Poster — Funny Nintendo Mii Parody Mii Need A Cigarette Poster — Funny Nintendo Mii Pa... $3499 Exhausted knight in armor collapsed face down under the words YOU MADE IT, on a doormat You Made It Doormat — Funny Introvert Welcome Mat $6999 Clawed green hands of a monster under the mat lifting it, LIFT HERE, on a doormat Lift Here Doormat — Funny Monster Under the Mat $6999 Melting castle with a drawbridge reading WELCOME-ISH over a slime moat, on a doormat Welcome-ish Funny Introvert Doormat $6999

For the one who explains the economy at dinner

All 3 →

Inflation, tuition, sportsbooks, and the confident tone of a man who has read one article.

Kevin O'Leary beside a holographic acronym: C-crypto, O-options, C-crypto, K-money mindset, on a sticker — White High Yield Portfolio Sticker — Funny Kevin O'Le... $499
Thinking about a shirt? Apparel is kept out of the Gift Shop deliberately, on the grounds that guessing a stranger's chest measurement is a gamble and we would rather you win. The 575 sized items live through in The Shirt Offensive and The War on Baldness, each with a measurement chart on the page. If you do not know the size, the same joke is almost always on a sticker or a mug in here.

49-72 of 346 results for "The Weird Castle Gift Shop"

Results

Every item is printed after you order it. Check each product page for sizes and fit.

The Berenstain Bears Guess Who Is Coming To Dinner Sticker — Parody#1 Best Seller in "why"The Berenstain Bears Guess Who Is Coming To Dinner Sticker — Parody
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Lincoln 1-Star Review Sticker — Funny Abraham Lincoln Ford's TheatreCastle's Choice overallLincoln 1-Star Review Sticker — Funny Abraham Lincoln Ford's Theatre
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
You Wanna Be Rude To Me Sticker — Funny Passive AggressiveYou Wanna Be Rude To Me Sticker — Funny Passive Aggressive
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Sponsored ⓘ
Unsolved Mysteries: Tower 7 Sticker — Funny Wtc 7Unsolved Mysteries: Tower 7 Sticker — Funny Wtc 7
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Sponsored ⓘ
Gotta Summon 'Em All Sticker — Funny Satanic PanicGotta Summon 'Em All Sticker — Funny Satanic Panic
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
you don't need therapy Sticker — Funny Gym Humoryou don't need therapy Sticker — Funny Gym Humor
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Too Horny For Chili's Sticker — Funny Horny in This ChilisToo Horny For Chili's Sticker — Funny Horny in This Chilis
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
You Are Not Enough Sticker — Funny You Need to Be More JackedYou Are Not Enough Sticker — Funny You Need to Be More Jacked
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
It Looks Like You're Entering The Time Of Monsters Sticker — ClippyIt Looks Like You're Entering The Time Of Monsters Sticker — Clippy
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Discussion Post Gangsta Sticker — Funny Gangsta SpongebobDiscussion Post Gangsta Sticker — Funny Gangsta Spongebob
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Badass Skeleton Asking For Pickles Sticker — Funny Grim Reaper PicklesBadass Skeleton Asking For Pickles Sticker — Funny Grim Reaper Pickles
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Give Them A Reason Sticker — Funny Sonic the HedgehogGive Them A Reason Sticker — Funny Sonic the Hedgehog
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Hide And Seek Professional Help Sticker — Funny Sonic the HedgehogHide And Seek Professional Help Sticker — Funny Sonic the Hedgehog
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
2 Blinkers No Lunch Goldblum Sticker — Funny Jeff Goldblum2 Blinkers No Lunch Goldblum Sticker — Funny Jeff Goldblum
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Craving $700 Sticker — Funny Anthropomorphic WolfCraving $700 Sticker — Funny Anthropomorphic Wolf
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Life Ain't All Hotdogs Cat Sticker — Funny Nihilist QuoteLife Ain't All Hotdogs Cat Sticker — Funny Nihilist Quote
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
No Moral Obligation Sticker — Funny SkeletonNo Moral Obligation Sticker — Funny Skeleton
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Sponsored ⓘ
Horny In This Chili's Sticker — Funny Meme DecalHorny In This Chili's Sticker — Funny Meme Decal
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Ontological Paperclip Sticker — Clippy Microsoft Office AssistantOntological Paperclip Sticker — Clippy Microsoft Office Assistant
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Existential Paperclip Sticker — Clippy Paperclip Existential MemeExistential Paperclip Sticker — Clippy Paperclip Existential Meme
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Tuck Em In Sticker — Funny Mob Boss Cigar WarningTuck Em In Sticker — Funny Mob Boss Cigar Warning
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Gotta Go Nowhere Sticker — Funny Sonic Introvert MemeGotta Go Nowhere Sticker — Funny Sonic Introvert Meme
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
20 Beers In A Ghost Sticker — Funny Halo Ghost Vehicle Meme20 Beers In A Ghost Sticker — Funny Halo Ghost Vehicle Meme
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked
Chief of Staff Sticker — Funny Trump Master Chief MashupChief of Staff Sticker — Funny Trump Master Chief Mashup
Options: 2 sizes
$499
✓prime-ish FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ — fast, and tracked

Browse The Weird Castle Gift Shop by theme

For Everyone, Against Everything see all ›
Number One Luxury Reptile Crime Hat — Funny Lacoste Parody Number One Luxury Reptile Crime Hat — F... $3999 The Streets Are Listening T-Shirt — Funny 90s Rap Mouse The Streets Are Listening T-Shirt — Fun... $2599 Steamboat Spinal Cord T-Shirt — Steamboat Willie Spinal Cord Parody Steamboat Spinal Cord T-Shirt — Steambo... $2599 JFC Original Recipe Hat — Funny JFC Jesus KFC Parody JFC Original Recipe Hat — Funny JFC Jes... $3999 JFC Original Recipe Hat — Funny JFC Jesus KFC Parody JFC Original Recipe Hat — Funny JFC Jes... $3999 Haddonfield Pro Skater T-Shirt — Funny Michael Myers Haddonfield Pro Skater T-Shirt — Funny ... $2499
The Men’s Division see all ›
Civil War Veteran T-Shirt — Proudly Served (1861-1865) Civil War Veteran T-Shirt — Proudly Ser... $4999 raised by literal dinosaurs T-Shirt — Dinosaurs TV Show Boomer Humor raised by literal dinosaurs T-Shirt — D... $2599 Alqaida Originals T-Shirt — 9/11 Dark Humor Parody Tee Alqaida Originals T-Shirt — 9/11 Dark H... $2599 Spreading Democracy One Barrel At A Time Shirt — Funny War for Oil Spreading Democracy One Barrel At A Tim... $2599
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Production and delivery vary by item Tracked to your door FREE U.S. shipping on orders $20+ 30-day return requests · eligibility applies A person answers your email Shipping details

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